


End of July

by Yemoja



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, F/M, Fluff, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2019-09-03
Packaged: 2020-10-06 02:43:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20499566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yemoja/pseuds/Yemoja
Summary: Peter is devastated about the death of Stark, and finds comfort in talking to his AI, Karen.





	End of July

**Author's Note:**

> Edit: Redid the ending to this chapter since I wasn't happy with it the first time ^^;;
> 
> Based on the song End of July by Paper Lions
> 
> I'm hoping to make this a continued series so stay tuned ! I love Peter x Karen so hopefully this'll go well !

White knuckles clutched at his pillow, as all Peter could do was give choked sobs. He was tense - trembling, even. His puffy eyes remained tightly shut, and his cheeks were tainted a faint red. His frame was curled - knees pulled to chest and hands wrapped tightly his tear-stained pillow.

_ “ You’re gonna do great things, kiddo. Remember that. “ _

His body jerked a bit - he bared his teeth and gritted them, trying to hold back another cry. He remembered Tony’s voice - the way his lips curled into a smirk any time he was able to make the man chuckle or laugh. He remembered his eyes, ones that could bore into his soul - and his voice, one he’d play on repeat for all eternity if he could. But he couldn’t. And all he could remember were the moments he spent with him. It had been like this for over three months - ever since Stark had passed away. He stayed in his room at a constant, barely ate or even bathed himself. He was a mess - but it was one of the last things on his mind. There was always a heavy empty feeling inside of him - a feeling that tore at his soul, picking at it like scavengers would a carcass. Even then - he was never able to find something to take his mind from his face - Tony’s face. His smile - his everything. 

His fingers curled around his pillow as his grip tightened - breath heaving and becoming suddenly heavy. He swallowed a hard lump that stabbed at his throat - and all he could feel were more tears fill his already clenched-shut eyes. Nostrils flared as he sat up - he balled his hands into fists and felt his heart thump hard in his chest. His eyebrows were furrowed in a tight knot, and he soon reached to rub at his face furiously. He wanted the_ tears _gone - he wanted the_ pain_ _gone._

The thoughts in his head roared - and now he was screaming. All he could do was try to get away from them. He slipped out of bed, scrambling to his closet in search of his suit. He grabbed it roughly - tossing it to the floor and fumbling to get his sweatpants off. His movements were shaky and jolted - his body still tense from the breakdown he previously endured. Nothing in his mind was clear - but his body screamed for him to get out of there. To think of  _ something else _ . Anything - anything but this. He tugged his mask on and -

“Welcome back, Peter. Heading out tonight?”

“Kuh - . . . Karen?” She gave a quiet whir when she heard her name, and Peter felt himself slowly tumbling back onto the edge of his bed. 

“Are you alright, Peter? Your heartbeat has reached significantly high levels. I can sense that you are stressed. Is something wrong?” His breath hitched in his throat as he reached a hand to claw at his own chest. There was a weight on him - one that restricted his breathing and put pressure against his heart. He bit his lip beneath the mask, eyes slowly darting along at all the things in his room. A blue zip-up jacket that hung on the doorknob of his closet - a pair of black sneakers sprawled by the door. His desk - with his computer, notebooks and pencils. Clammy hands slowly rested down on the sheets, and he let out a long shaky breath.

“Peter?”

“I -. . . Yeah - I’m -. . . I’m okay -” He mustered. He let his eyes fall shut - slowly leaning himself backward to lay down again. Sweat beads rolled down most of his frame - and Karen gave a nervous whir. “Peter? Your heat levels and heart rate are way too high - I think you may be experiencing a panic attack - just listen to my voice, okay? I’m right here, Peter -”

His body ached. It ached from writhing and sobbing on a constant, it ached from the panic attacks he had on a near daily. He could barely trust himself with his own emotions - but for this moment, he pushed past the weight that bored itself into his chest - and listened to her. He swallowed hard, focusing on the softness of her voice - how, even though being an AI, she was able to at least show a little bit of emotion that he could relate to. She cooed to him - murmuring sweet nothings in attempt to drift his mind away from whatever caused him so much distress. For once - in a long time - he had found his nerves calming down. Even if it was just a tiny - little bit.


End file.
